59

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Don’t get too excited. It’s just 59. Not the other one.

Can we give some claps to the man and woman who got us here—Tony and Donna Vallone.

April 1, 2024, marked our 59th year of being in business. And another clap to the hundreds of men and women who helped build Tony’s to what it is today. It’s a beautiful business. But back to the man, the more I see from his purview—the more I get it. Tony was curious, creative, demanding, but Tony survived, I think, because of his grit.

It's when you hit the sand, but realize it’s mud it isn’t warm. It’s cold and wet and your joints are stiff. In order to breathe you can do only one thing--use your elbows to pull your face up from that wet sludge--and then next, push your body using your knees now, up even more. And then you use one knee to get some balance and then the other, steady now. And then you stand.

And then you take a shower. A shave. Pat the cheeks, put on a suit, a smile, and figure out how you got in the sludge and how to take care of it. That’s running a restaurant. Little things, little things. Big things though, big things will throw all they have at you. But you must get up. Tony got up. Donna gets up. Lauri gets up. We get up. And we do Tony’s because somewhere along the way, what this man built and believed in, it crept into our souls as well. That’s why we are here. For our guests. Our pleasure is to serve you, see you happy and safe, fed and celebrated.

I found myself with nothing to do for 45 minutes before dinner service before I left for vacation not long ago.  That never happens—the part where there is not one thing I could be doing. My legs walked me to the green room, the room I built for myself that used to hold bleach and other chemicals, but now it holds my thoughts for the restaurant as well as a faded magenta chaise lounge. I sat down and he led my eyes to the binder Donna had handed me months ago.

Cooking with Passion. His unpublished cookbook from the early 2000’s. I flipped the cover, the next page, the next, and began to read.  I hadn’t heard his voice in four years. Four long years of nudges and inklings yes, but I began to absorb his words, cradling them as I read. He begins his Acknowledgments section with this;

“Remembering the years of struggle when first starting out on my own, I am particularly indebted to those who were there for me in the beginning, and feel very fortunate to have their continuing friendship. As new friends and associates have entered my personal and business life over the years, the struggle has given way to joy, both personal and professional. “

Oh, T. You struggled? From what I observed, the last ten years of his life, I would have never guessed it.  And on he writes- what an excellent writer he was, turns of phrases, I chuckled here, there, and the tears fell when I realized that every time I told him about how I was trying to make it as a writer, he never once said; I’m a writer too. He just encouraged me on and on and I think that was very telling of him as a man. It was never about him. It was about the person sitting across from him. Oh sure an anecdote here and there, the wisdom, I gobbled it up, and I loved a good joke or juicy story, the kind where he first looked right then left before telling.

I miss him. I miss dining with him for many reasons because he taught me how, but I miss the little things like him tipping his wine glass into mine so I could finish his share too. “It’s too good to waste, you’ve got some work to do,” his eyes twinkling.

He was right about many things but he was definitely right about that. It is too good to waste, and we have some work to do. And so, I look forward to this year, to our next service, and to meeting you, if I haven’t already.